When Parenting

When I was a kid, I have always complained to my parents. Simple things such as “Mom why does Philip get to have this?” or “Can I go out, Mark’s parents allowed him why won’t you allow me?” and finally “You’re the worst parents ever!” I would usually say these things when I’m ignored. You know typical kid stuff. These remarks from me would often lead to some spanking or some hardcore sermons making me hate my parents even more. I was so ignorant back then. Now I have learned to be more open-minded and complacent.  Parenting, as I observed, isn’t always easy. I never really understood what my parents were going through until now.

Parenting is the process of providing support - physically, socially, emotionally and intellectually -  during the development of a child. Parenting can differ in different families. There are terms for these parenting styles namely Authoritarian parenting, authoritative parenting, permissive parenting and uninvolved parenting. Basically authoritarian parenting is like marshal law, sort off. This type of parenting is influenced by a set of rules that must be strictly followed. When you don’t follow these rules get ready for some heavy sermons and spankings. The authoritative parenting on the other hand is less strict. This focuses on giving rewards and less punishment is given. The parents here are much more supportive. The permissive parenting is a type of parenting where the children are given mostly the freedom to do anything as long as the parents find it reasonable. The uninvolved parenting style is when the parents are usually emotionally absent and also physically absent. (Baumrind 1983)   

These parenting styles have advantages and disadvantages. The authoritarian parenting tends to produce children who are more moody, more vulnerable to stress because of pressure, and are very limited since it is the parents who set the rules. This parenting style however trains the child for the future. Since the authoritative parenting is a combination love and limitations, the child is very open to the parents. The emotions and behavior of the child is well developed. In this parenting style however, it is difficult to maintain the balance of the child’s behavior and emotions. Permissive parenting produces children that are very creative and very happy. The downside is the child tends to be more dependent when they grow up. In the uninvolved parenting style children are more responsible of theirs elves since the parents are usually not there. Although they still provide the child with the basic needs, they have little contact with them. This makes the child feel ignored or hated. (Baumrind 1983)

Also these parenting styles are influenced by culture or what the parents have gone through. (Aguila 2003). With this I have conducted my research about my family. My father was always a passive parent. Occasionally he is somewhat emotionally absent to us. This is probably the result of my dad’s childhood. Growing up my dad’s mother didn’t really take care of him much. My mother on the other hand is authoritative. Probably because of her parents giving her the basic needs with love and compassion.

I have finally understood why every parent is different. It has something to do with culture, as well as how they were raised as a child.   

References:

Boundless. “Authority Patterns.” Boundless Sociology. Boundless, 14 Nov. 2014. Retrieved 09 Apr. 2015 from https://www.boundless.com/sociology/textbooks/boundless-sociology-textbook/family-12/family-91/authority-patterns-523-3319/

parenting. (n.d.). Collins English Dictionary - Complete & Unabridged 10th Edition. Retrieved April 09, 2015, from http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/parenting

SocSci10 Z Group 5


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